Read More Virginia

Lucky Little

1965 Ashland, Kentucky continued....

“I love you”, Steve says to her as a last resort. He hadn’t told her that before when he had managed to work his way up between her sweater and bra just a week ago. Ginny still had a bad feeling in her gut about that day but at the same time she remembered the buzz it gave her also. Before Steve, she had only once been kissed on the lips and that was a few years before by a boy in her bible study class. At 14 she knew good and well that it was not right but allowed Jimmy to give her a quick peck anyway just to prove that she was not a ‘prude’. Unfortunately that quick kiss cost her two weeks of washing dishes without the help of her brother John since the incident was seen by another kid in class that was quick to tell his mom who in turn told Ginny’s dad, the preacher at their church. Now she was 17 and was growing tired of being the preacher’s daughter that was expected to be perfect in every way. Preacher’s kids get a tough rap. I’ve seen it myself now. One of my pastors had four awesome kids, two boys and two girls. They were on fire for Jesus and were extremely educated in scripture. As teenagers they had the same things going on inside them as any other kids. If any of them ever so much as had a bad attitude or slipped up and said something ‘ungodly’ there were always plenty of ‘church folk’ waiting and ready to condemn them. So unfair. ‘Church folk’ that would go around and spread the news that the pastor’s kid was less than godly. Didn’t they realize that they were the ones, the exact ones, that made people stay far away from church, far away from God? They will be at church every Sunday with a big smile on their face while at the same time looking to call out someone else for any little thing. As in life, instead of concentrating and working on their own issues, people think if they can just show someone to be lower or less than themselves they will be elevated, if only in their own minds. Nobody wins when that nonsense is happening. The bible says before you point out the speck of dust in your brother’s eye, first remove the plank from your own eye. I guess they just skimmed over that one. Killing, stealing and adultery are the most recognized ‘don’ts’ in the bible but gossiping is in there too. Spreading tales whether true or false about someone or a situation is grotesque and it leads to so many bad things. It is surely a form of bullying and people that call themselves Christians are so often guilty of it. As Steve runs his hand up her thigh and under her skirt Ginny says, “Tell me again, tell me that you love me”. “I love you”, he says and his hand goes higher. Ginny knew in her mind that what was happening was wrong but she had successfully convinced herself that in this instance, since he did love her, it was surely okay. Steve was different from the boys Ginny had met at church. He was so cool and confident. He didn’t pretend to be a good boy. He didn’t pose as something he wasn’t like all the other boys. He actually was tough and rough and a rebel. He drank beer and drove fast and did whatever else he wanted to do. His dad owned a big construction company in town and hired most of the town’s police force at one time or another to work side jobs for him guarding his many projects so the force looked the other way when Steve was up to no good. To be in the backseat of his Chevy surrendering to her flesh was living out a fantasy she had imagined before she even knew she had hormones. The rebel sweeps the preacher’s daughter off her feet, and her mind was turned to mush the moment he slipped his tongue in her mouth. It was like the movie she had seen on the opposite screen at the drive-in as a child. Now she was basking in that moment. Before she could gain her senses the passion turned to submission and her virginity was taken. Not so much taken as it was given away. Either way it was worded, they were making love and she would never have another ‘first time’. The first time is all it would take. Ginny would find out before too long that she was indeed pregnant. As a young naïve girl, her mind, heart and soul would be flooded with thoughts and feelings previously only reserved for adults. Her excitement turned to shame, her new found empowerment turned to embarrassment, her joy turned to heartache. How could she have done this to her parents? How could Steve have done this to her? “Is this love”? she asked herself. What would she do now? What would they do now? She felt separated from God, from her family and from everything she was brought up to be. “Think Virginia, think”, she whispered to herself as a tear made its way down her cheek. “I’m sorry God, I’m so sorry. Help me Lord”.

A Pursuit on Purpose